


Loneliness

by priestess_juno



Category: Persona 3
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-26
Updated: 2019-09-26
Packaged: 2020-10-28 12:16:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,074
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20778419
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/priestess_juno/pseuds/priestess_juno
Summary: Part 1 of 2 of a One Shot // Fuuka confesses to a comatose Shinjiro how everything has been going, and yet she wonders how bad loneliness can really feel and tug at the heartstrings. // slight Fuuka/Shinjiro





	1. Alone

January 31st, the dreaded day. The day where S.E.E.S. would actually go against Death, literally. It scared Fuuka, but she never admitted it to anyone–well, she has to one person, but he never listened. Fuuka opened the door to the hospital room, the room smelling like freshly cut flowers (meaning Yukari or Mitsuru was here) as she gave off a small chuckle.

“You would hate **that** smell, right Aragaki-senpai?” She whispered softly, no response from the comatose senpai on the opposite side of the room.

Closing the door, Fuuka moved towards Shinjiro, sitting down in the most uncomfortable chair on the planet. “So,” she put her hands in her lap, giving him a lukewarm smile, “as per usual, Junpei is much better–he cried himself to sleep over knowing Chidori was alive. …how quickly his feelings change within a week, huh?” She whispered, her lips turning into a small frown. “Chidori won’t even know who he is… …but he didn’t care–she…_she_ was back in his life.”

Fuuka closed her eyes, a heavy breath being released from her chest as she felt a tear escaping her eye. “…I truly wish it was me. Does that make me jealous?” Fuuka asked, knowing the question was purely rhetorical. Who would even answer her back? “Then again, I guess it is better to be jealous now and let it out–we might…_die_ tonight.” Fuuka uttered, opening her eyes and wiping the tear away.

“I’m not scared. Oddly, I’m **not**. After losing Junpei's interest…and even you, it’s been a really long roller coaster ride, always going up and down every month. Then again, confessing everything to you has made me feel better–you always were the best listener in the group.” Fuuka got up from her seat, pushing some hair behind her ear, walking towards the window and opening the blinds slightly. “I feel like these weekly confessions really help. …though, it’d be nice if you could talk, too… …hahaha–in my dreams, right?” She let out a small laugh, looking through the window and seeing children playing with their parents and an elderly couple having lunch together.

Fuuka put her hand on the window sill, her head lowered slightly. “Everyone else is doing well–Sanada-senpai and Kirijo-senpai are doing well, Ken-kun and Koro-chan are eating well–trust me I am not cooking for them.” She stated, turning around and giving him a smile. “But, my sugar cookies are great, and sushi rolls are excellent, thanks to our leader teaching me.” Fuuka held her finger out towards the sleeping senpai. “One time–that’s all it took for me to make peanut butter cookies. …then again, it was not that hard.”

She walked back towards the bed, knowing the silence can only go so far. Fuuka let feet be dragged back to the chair next to the bed once more. “…and us juniors are well. You know about Junpei, and Aigis and Yukari are the same, and our leader is also well–she’s been slowly getting better, emotionally that is…” She slowly stated, wondering if she should even state that their leader is moving on…without Shinjiro at her side and with Akihiko instead. 

_What would happen if Shinjiro knew that our leader moved on without him?_

“…” Fuuka carefully moved her hand towards Shinjiro’s, but she just grabbed the sheets next to him. She watched his chest moving up and down, over and over, as the monitors around him were still beeping in sync. She let out a sigh, knowing that staring at him wouldn’t wake him up any sooner. “…I wish you were there to help us battle Nyx. But, I am sure we will win. I **know** it. Still, there is a bad feeling in my gut that something will go wrong.” Fuuka murmured, her eyes turning to the tube down his throat–it didn’t scare her, but it worried her that even with the gunshot wounds that are fully healed (and leaving possible permanent scars), he couldn’t breathe on his own.

“…I apologize…that this happened to you. I know I say this every other week, but Takaya was looking for **me**, not you. You took the bullet for me…” Fuuka’s hand reached for his, gripping it tightly. “But, seeing you here has helped me. A lot.” Fuuka admitted, a small smile on her face. “…I hope you’ll awake–don’t forget, March 5th is Graduation Day for the seniors.” Fuuka kept saying that over and over, making sure he wouldn’t forget. “I really am hoping that you will come see us…and wish them luck.” Fuuka murmured. She looked over at the clock, knowing that their leader will be here soon. “She’s going to be here soon–she’s always here right at 5.”

Getting up from her chair, her hand slowly left his–but, she swore, that she felt a small squeeze of her index finger, as her breath got caught in her throat. “…!” Fuuka turned her attention back to Shinjiro, just for a moment, and gave him a small smile. “…thanks, senpai. I’ll be sure to keep that close to my heart.” Fuuka let his hand go slowly, fixing his hair up so that their leader would enjoy his company a little more. “Now, you be a good listener, okay? She…might need this more than I.” Fuuka touched her lips, hesitant to even kiss his forehead, so she just left as fast as Shinjiro touched her finger. 

Closing the door, she gripped her shirt where her heart was–she began to wonder if this was really good for her. _If he never wakes…what would that do to our leader…to everyone? _So, she began to drag her body back to the dorm, wondering what tonight would bring–a huge battle with Strega and Nyx, in the same night. Fuuka need rest, lots of it, if she was going to keep most of her sanity tonight.

But, for now, she focused on how happy she was that maybe, just _maybe_, that Shinjiro was going to wake up soon. And that maybe she wouldn’t feel alone once again.


	2. Silence is Golden

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Part 2 of 2 of a One Shot // Fuuka confesses to a comatose Shinjiro how everything has been going, and yet she wonders how bad loneliness can really feel and tug at the heartstrings. // slight Fuuka/Shinjiro

With the sun slowly blinding her in the morning, after a long, hard night battling Nyx, Fuuka’s eyelids fluttered open, dreading the morning. Fuuka knew something happened last night, but she wasn’t sure what exactly happened–her arms and legs ached, as well as her chest, too.

“Mmm…maybe I am sick?” She wondered outloud, pulling the sheets over her head. Memories of last night flashbulbed in her mind–a tall, black figure, the night sky and the moon bright and huge as could be–as she winced and gripped her forehead. “Yes–this might be me being sick…” She concluded as she sat up slowly, realizing that she was in the dorm where students could choose to live.

“Hmm. Maybe I **am** sick if I forgot I lived in the dorms.”

Fuuka closed her eyes, beginning to brush her hair. Her calendar on the wall still showed January, so she got up and changed it to February–she almost dropped the tack used to hold the calendar up on the wall and winced as another headache came on. “Why…is the 31st circled?” She pondered, noticing that the 21st was also circled–was it something important? “Oh yeah–that’s when that big test was!” Fuuka smiled, not realizing it was the day that Chidori came back to life.

After adjusting the calendar and turning back to her clothes in the closet, she decided to just skip out on school for today–it was a _Monday_ after all. Fuuka reached for her morning medicine–vitamins, mainly–and stared at them for a long time. “…vitamins…” She whispered, touching her lips as something flashed through her head–a maroon trenchcoat, a tall figure–she almost fell down at the intensity of the headache. Fuuka whimpered as she made it over to her bed to sit down–she gripped her shirt, wondering why the headaches wasn’t going away at all.

“Wh…well, maybe one day without vitamins won’t kill me.” She laughed as she just reached for a bottle of water she always kept nearby and sipped some. “Maybe some breakfast will help?” Fuuka asked softly to herself, noting she was mostly presentable, and went downstairs. She saw Yukari Takeba downstairs, sitting on the couch and fixing up her bow–but, Fuuka noticed she seemed slightly distant–was it because of a tournament coming up? She didn’t both to talk to her–they didn’t know each other well, so did it really matter?

Moving towards the kitchen to make herself some oatmeal, she saw Junpei Iori casually eating an apple while trying to read some manga–Fuuka knew he had an obsession with manga, but she wouldn’t talk to him since he was friends with Yukari anyway–she never really made any close friends. After making her breakfast and heading back up the stairs, Akihiko Sanada came downstairs, passing each other and a slight nod from Akihiko was all Fuuka got from him.

_Is everyone in a bad mood? Did I do something? Did…something happen and I wasn’t aware of it?_

No matter–Fuuka continued towards the girls floor, seeing Mitsuru filing some paperwork out in the lounge, her eyes drifting towards the shy tactician, as Fuuka quickly moved to her room. She could _never_ talk to her–she was so rich and so busy, Fuuka knew Mitsuru would never have time for her. Quickly moving towards her room, closing the door, and sitting down, Fuuka felt her appetite diminish in minutes. “…and my stomach ends up betraying me.” Fuuka moves to throw the food away in the trash and stopped to see the evoker on her desk.

She placed the food down on the desk and reached for the evoker. “What…? What is this doing here?!” Fuuka grabbed it and began to go give this to Mitsuru, but she stopped herself before she grabbed her doorknob. It felt heavy like a gun, but didn’t really look like you could really hurt yourself, right? “It’s not like I’ve thought of it before…” She whispered as she felt her fingers trembling, putting the evoker to her head.

But froze as she could faintly hear a woman’s voice–a soft voice, delicate and smooth–as she dropped the evoker on the ground. “No. …I am stronger.” She whispered, her eyes shooting back to her food as she ate delicately. Fuuka’s mind flashed back to everything–the seniors, the juniors, the man with the maroon trenchcoat, the robot–wait. Fuuka blinked. “Since when was the robot new?” She bit her lip, her eyes darting around her room, unsure if her memory is betraying her or not. Another sharp and painful headache made Fuuka wince, almost letting out a cry of pain, as she kept quiet. Fuuka knew everyone was busy with their own lives–she didn’t want them to be concern about her.

So, she ate her food and threw it away as fast as her headaches came and went. A couple pills of ibuprofen to dull the pain away as she looked back at her calendar. A big, bright red circle was around the 7th, and the 14th, as well as the 21st and the 28th–all of them were Sundays. And all of them had four words written on each of them: **_Seeing Shinjiro-senpai, 4 o’clock._**

“…who is…Shinjiro-senpai? Is this a tutor session?” She winced, her hands gripping her head tightly as she bit her lip, crying in pain. She shook her head, wishing the medicine would kick in sooner rather than later–she slid to the floor, taking deep breaths slowly, as the headache went away as she slowly forgot Shinjiro altogether. Fuuka looked through her phone, not finding no number with his name anywhere. She shrugged it off. “Oh well, it might be just an error or something.” Fuuka pushed herself back to bed, pulling the sheets over her head and sighing heavily. “Am I the only one sick?” She whispered, letting sleep claim her body delicately.

But, she didn’t know everyone was in pain, that they were suffering in their own ways. When the memories came rushing back a month later, she realized something that made her heart ache even more: she was the first to forget Shinjiro but the last to comfort Shinjiro after their leader’s death. 

**Author's Note:**

> Just love finding old stuff and posting it on here to a bigger crowd. I think there is a part 2 somewhere...I'll have to find it!


End file.
